Yesterday (February 1) marked the eleventh anniversary of my pastorate at Western Meadows Baptist Church.

Here then are eleven thoughts from eleven years of pastoring.

1. CLARITY FOSTERS UNITY
2. THICK SKIN; TENDER HEART
3. A SHEPHERD, NOT A CEO
4. PASTORING TAKES TIME
5. TEACH FIRST, AND MAKE BIG CHANGES SLOWLY
6. ORGANIZING SERMONS BY YEAR
7. THE PRIMARY WORK IS LARGELY UNSEEN
8. READING WIDELY AND DEEPLY
9. LEARNING THE CLASSICAL LANGUAGES
10. THE IMPORTANCE OF FAMILY
11. A HEART OF GRATITUDE

CLARITY FOSTERS UNITY

This was one of the earliest lessons that the Lord graciously taught me. During the pastoral search process, I made a deliberate effort to be upfront with the committee about my theological convictions. I told them plainly that I leaned toward Reformed theology and that I was convinced that the Bible teaches a plurality of elders. I purchased copies of Elders in the Life of the Church for the search committee members, so they could get an idea for what I believed. If they were firmly against moving to a plurality of elders, then it would have been best for us to part ways. Thankfully, the Lord used that honesty to bring clarity and unity from the beginning of my ministry.

I have attempted to carry that principle throughout my ministry as well. We encourage prospective members to attend the church for about six months before formally joining, which gives them time to experience the life of the church before making a wholesale commitment.

We then have a membership class that attempts to have the same clarity of convictions. The first two sessions focus on the church’s values and leadership, but the third class addresses our distinctives. These are secondary doctrines that members are not required to agree with in order to join the church, but they do need to understand them and commit to not being quarrelsome over them.

One of those distinctives is Reformed theology, specifically Calvinism, which I and most of our congregation affirm. Calvinism is a particularly charged doctrine, and since I do not declare myself to be a Calvinist from the pulpit each Sunday, I make my views clear at the membership class.

I stress that many members do not hold to Calvinism and that future members are not required to do so either. But I make it clear upfront because that is a deal-breaking doctrine for some people.

I think of one couple in particular who loved the church so much that they attended two membership classes. They are kind, faithful, but very anti-Calvinist in their convictions. After plenty of conversations, they decided to depart from the church. There was no bitterness, no slander; just honesty and respectful disagreement. Even now, when we see each other around town, things aren’t awkward. We greet each other, catch up, and part warmly.

That kind of peace is possible because convictions were expressed earlier on.

Of course, being upfront with convictions does not prevent all pain in ministry, but it does prevent much unnecessarily painful situations.

THICK SKIN; TENDER HEART

A pastor friend of mine often says, “Don’t take things personally, even when they’re personal.”

That is sound advice.

Pastoral ministry is a public office. Criticism is simply part of the territory. Anyone who enters pastoral ministry must be prepared to receive criticism and to respond wisely.

Here is the difficulty. A pastor must have a certain thickness of skin. Criticism cannot be allowed to crush or dominate. At the same time, he must also have a tender enough heart to listen carefully, considering whether there may be even a grain of truth in what was said.

One of the hardest areas is when people decide to leave the church. It can be difficult enough when visitors flatly conclude that your church is not the right fit for them. But it is much more painful when long-standing members decide to move on from the church. In the first several years, we had a series of such departures, each involving relatively close friends. Each came with long conversations, prayer, and genuine sorrow. And each ultimately left.

Through those experiences, the Lord graciously taught me the truth of not taking things personally, even the reason is personal.

No church will ever be the perfect fit for every person. And I will never be the right pastor for everyone. While each church should be warm, hospitable, and welcoming, it is a mistake to attempt to cater to everyone. If you try to please everyone, you end up pleasing no one. Faithfulness to the Lord must be the ultimate goal, not the approval of men.

Over time, I have also learned that people who must be constantly persuaded to stay are often a drain on the health of the church as a whole. There are certainly cases where someone desires to leave because they are resisting conviction of sin or fleeing repentance. Those are circumstances worth fighting for. But in most cases, when people leave, it is because they no longer share the vision of the church, and more often than not, the church becomes healthier when they move on.

Even when you are the explicit reason by someone moves on, keep the parting amicable. You may still see each other around town. Lord willing, you stand together before the Lord for eternity. So, don’t take things personally, even when they are personal.

A SHEPHERD, NOT A CEO

In much of modern church culture, especially those influenced by the megachurch movements, there is pressure (even a necessity) for pastors to function primarily as organizational leaders, brand managers, or executives. But that is not the biblical calling of a pastor.

In the New Testament, three titles are used for the office of pastor: elder, overseer, and pastor. Of these, elder is the most frequently used. I believe this is to emphasize the moral and spiritual maturity that is required. Every pastor must be an elder: someone whose life models the character and wisdom expected of God’s people.

The term overseer speaks to governance and administration, while pastor emphasizes shepherding. The heart of pastoral ministry is twofold, as Titus 1:9 makes clear: to feed the sheep and fend off wolves. Both tasks are fundamentally doctrinal. A pastor feeds God’s people with the truth of His Word and protects them from false teachings that constantly threaten the church.

While pastors are called to exercise oversight, they are not meant to function as CEOs. Indeed, one of the great blessings of my ministry has been the faithful lay elders who have served alongside me. They help give me the freedom, as a vocational pastor, to fulfill the calling of a pastor-theologian, that is, to give myself to the study of the Scriptures, to wrestle with the original languages, to think carefully about doctrine, history, and the world around us, and to labor so that I might faithfully lead God’s people through His Word.

Theological shallowness in the modern church is not accidental. It is often the fruit of pastors being pulled away from prayer and the ministry of the Word and pushed into executive roles that they were never meant to fill. Two books articulate this vision quite well: The Pastor as Public Theologian and The Pastor-Theologian.

I am deeply thankful that Western Meadows does not expect me to be a CEO. The exception is for me to herald God’s Word, both from the pulpit and in personal meetings, visitations, and counseling.

That is the calling of a pastor.

PASTORING TAKES TIME

I once read that it takes five years to really become a congregation’s pastor.

That’s true.

In my first couple of years, I was very well received by the older members of the congregation. One, Miss June, virtually adopted me as her grandson (or great-grandson, perhaps). She would make a special batch of snickerdoodle cookies for me whenever she cooked for the senior adults’ Bible study that met on Thursdays.

I was deeply loved by the older saints. But when many of them passed away, one of the previous pastors came to preach their funeral. And I fully understood. I simply hadn’t had enough time to fully become their pastor.

For a young pastor, that early season is actually helpful. The first funerals that I did preach were nerve-racking because I didn’t really know the person. But they were not emotionally heavy. Funerals now are much more emotionally difficult because there is now remembrance and real loss, but I also have much more experience with preaching funerals.

Pastoring takes time.

TEACH FIRST, AND MAKE BIG CHANGES SLOWLY

The saying is true: you overestimate what you can accomplish in one year but underestimate what you can accomplish in five. I’ve now had two sets of five years, and the church is entirely different from when I first arrived.

Some of the things that define Western Meadows now were desires I had in my very first years of ministry. I even tried some of them early on. They failed because they needed more time to take root.

One smaller change was our move to weekly observance of the Lord’s Supper. Before implementing the change, I preached a three-part series on the Lord’s Supper, and each service concluded with taking the Lord’s Supper. After those three consecutive weeks, I announced that we would take the Lord’s Supper weekly for a year, and we could return to monthly observance after that if we desired.

That was four years ago. Most members now say that when they visit another church and don’t take the Lord’s Supper, the service feels like its missing a crucial element.

A large change was moving to a plurality of elders. We affirmed our first lay elder in 2018, three years into my pastorate.

In 2017, I preached through Proverbs 1-9 and noticed that every section began with a call to listen to God’s Word. It was weekly gong: wisdom comes from God’s Word. Halfway through the series, I realized that it was the right time to teach what the Bible says about church leadership.

So we did. I taught a series called Biblical Leadership, and we presented our first elder candidate at the conclusion of the series.

There were questions, but the deacons were fully on board and helped to lead the process. No one left the church over a complete shift in church polity.

ORGANIZING SERMONS BY YEAR

I love to organize my sermons by year. Most of my major planning for the following year takes place in June or July, though plans certainly change. In 2019, I intended to preach through Hebrews the next year, but one night I woke up with the thought: Not Hebrews, Ephesians. In the morning, I mapped out Ephesians for 2020, which is what I then preached.

I try to view each year as a standalone unit with overall themes, an intentional flow, and internal coherence. Because of that, each year is very distinct in my memory.

For many members, I can remember during which sermon series they first began attending the church. For a few, I remember the specific sermon.

I also associate major life events with particular texts. For example, while I cannot remember the exact date when our daughter had her first seizure, I remember that it was a Saturday evening and that I preached Ecclesiastes 8 the next morning. I’ve given other examples in the article here.

Because I don’t allow sermon series to bleed from one year to the next, the years themselves don’t blur together in my memory. Each one stands on its own. I didn’t realize when I first started how much of a gift that practice would become, but it has been an immense blessing.

THE PRIMARY WORK IS LARGELY UNSEEN

In Acts 6, when the first deacons are appointed, the apostles, who function as proto-elders, say that it is not right for them to neglect prayer and the ministry of the Word in order to wait tables.

That pattern still stands.

Prayer is one of the most difficult aspects of pastoral ministry. It is secret work that no one sees. It is easy to postpone, to neglect, to rationalize away.

Yet is is foundational.

Notice that Acts 6 lists it before the ministry of the Word. Prayer shows true dependence upon the Lord, and the Word must be handled from a state of dependency.

Under the ministry of the Word, there are several convictions worth noting.

First, trust in the power and authority of God’s Word.

When I began pastoring at 24, everyone in the congregation was older than me. How was I suppose to teach and lead those who were double and even triple my age?

God’s Word.

The only real authority that a pastor has comes from his reliance upon and submission to God’s Word. Personality, experience, confidence, and whatever else are false comforts for the pastor. Trust the Scriptures.

Second, preach hard texts.

Preaching lectio continuo, verse-by-verse through books or texts, is the safest and surest way to preach all of God’s Word, even the uncomfortable things.

Now, a pastor should have the wisdom not to throw himself into books that he is utterly unprepared for. If I had preached Leviticus or Song of Songs at the beginning of my ministry, they likely would have been a trainwreck.

But you also cannot forever wait to be ready for hard texts. In 2016, I remember thinking how much I wanted to preach Proverbs but that I was not wise enough to do so yet. Then it hit me: no one is wise enough to preach Proverbs. The whole point of the book is to give wisdom to those who lack it. That realization freed me to come to Proverbs not as an expert but a student.

That posture is freeing. In Leviticus, I read a commentator (I could not recall who) that warned about the danger of thinking that we can be experts of Scripture rather than simply its students.

Pastors should wrestle with hard texts. It is the responsibility of the lead teaching pastor to proclaim the whole counsel of God’s Word and to demonstrate the truth of 1 Timothy 3:16: “All Scripture is God-breathed and profitable for teaching, for reproof, for correction, and for education in righteousness.

Finally, especially when coming to those difficult texts, wrestle until you limp.

I felt this powerfully in my recent sermon on Proverbs 30:18-20. I had been thinking about that text for months, and when I sat down on Monday morning to prepare, it came out smoothly and easily.

Then the Lord flattened me.

As I kept meditating, Agur’s words in verse 18 stopped being a line on the page and became a reality embedded within my soul. The deeper I considered, the more I realized how far beyond me the text truly was.

By the time I stood in the pulpit, I felt something rather like Jacob after wrestling with the angel: limping away, knowing that I had encountered the living God and been spared.

That will not happen every week, of course. Ministry has routines. Preaching can be just as mundane as anything else. But if that kind of wrestling never happens, then the Scriptures are not truly being mined.

At that point, it may be worth asking if ministry looks more like a CEO than a shepherd.

READING WIDELY AND DEEPLY

I have already talked about reading for preaching before, but it worth reiterating.

Pastors should read all kinds of things. Fiction. History. Poetry. Philosophy. Classics.

I do not read in order to hunt for illustrations. I read, instead, with the expectation that I will be shaped by what I read. Of course, that does not mean that I avoid all books that I disagree with because even those books are sharpening thought and discernment.

Pastors should be omnivores with books. Indeed, I find it helpful to have many books going at once, especially with books that I am skimming through for key ideas.

But there are books that should never be skimmed. C. S. Lewis is one such author for me. While I first met Lewis through his apologetic and fiction writings, I am now using his scholarly works as a guide into classical literature. He is a great model for how to read deeply.

The Puritans are also worth slow, careful reading.

Classics, Christian or common, should not be rushed. Homer, Virgil, Augustine, Calvin, and such all endure for a reason. Sit with them. Take your time. Even if you don’t enjoy them, at least develop an appreciation for why their writings are so influential.

LEARNING THE CLASSICAL LANGUAGES

About three years ago, I started learning Latin and then felt convicted that, as a pastor, I should also be learning Greek and Hebrew. I dove into Greek and fell in love with it, and I’ve also begun to study Hebrew. I wish an older pastor or mentor had encouraged me to do this sooner.

I love the analogy from Bill Mounce that a preacher’s knowledge of Greek and Hebrew should be like wearing underwear: most of the time, no one should see it, but it provides a great comfort and support to you, knowing it’s there. My preaching has become much bolder because I am increasingly able to rely on the original text without depending solely on commentators.

John Piper’s book, Brothers, We Are Not Professionals, has a chapter on this, and I remember reading it early in my ministry and completely ignoring it. I didn’t highlight or underline a single sentence. I now believe that was my conscience telling me what I needed to do, but I put it off.

Today, there are so many online resources that you don’t need to go to seminary to learn these languages. My advice is to start with Greek and Hebrew, but don’t neglect Latin. While Latin isn’t an original biblical language, it was the language of theology for over a thousand years and provides a great foundation. However, start with what you’re most passionate about, as that will be the best plan for you.

THE IMPORTANCE OF FAMILY

This was a difficult lesson for me to learn.

When we had our first daughter, she was born prematurely, and though she was perfectly healthy, we still needed to spend several days in the hospital. Shortly after we got home, one of the deacons asked whether we would still be having Wednesday night Bible study. I told him that I didn’t think so, and he said that we should.

And I decided to go ahead and have the Bible study anyway.

My wife was understandably upset that I was leaving her alone with our newborn daughter so soon after coming home. She believed (rightly) that I should have taken a least one week off of leading the Bible study.

Eleven years later, and with two more children added to the mix, I have learned to be a much better advocate for my family and the time that I need to give them.

One practice I’ve started of the last several months is meeting weekly with one of my daughters. Sine we have three, each gets one-on-one focused time with me every three weeks. We go to coffee shop in town, and they sip a chai tea while they have at least an hour of my uninterrupted attention.

They see me meeting with people for coffee all the time, so they get to have a coffee meeting with Dad.

I began doing this because as a pastor, I regularly give people my time. That is the nature of the work. But I must make primary time for my own daughters because, aside from my wife, they ought to be the most important members of the congregation to me.

That may sound like an exaggeration, but it is both logically and theologically true.

Logically, if I were to die today, the church would grieve, mourn, and then call another pastor. My wife and children, however, would feel my absence for the rest of their lives.

Theologically, my wife and children are the only members of the congregation whose spiritual collapse would directly call my qualifications as an elder into question. If they were to turn from the Lord, the church has a responsibility to at least examine whether I am still qualified to shepherd God’s people.

If that is true, then why would I not give them the highest priority? Why would I not make regular, intentional time to shepherd them?

As for our marriage, my wife and I have benefitted tremendously from doing premarital counseling and marital counseling together. Every time we counsel another couple, it leads to deeper conversations between us. We often talk afterward about how to best help them, and it always leads to a greater understanding of our own relationship.

Of course, counseling can be done well by a pastor alone. Indeed, there have been times when my wife was unable to be present. But there is something uniquely helpful about a couple counseling another couple.

If you are a pastor involved in biblical counseling and if your wife is open and gift for it, counseling couples together is worth considering.

A HEART OF GRATITUDE

I am deeply thankful for many things over the course of these eleven years.

Though it may seem small, I am thankful for the monthly book reimbursement that the church provides. A library functions like an external neurological network, extending memory and thinking. I have been able to pursue the calling of a pastor-theologian in large part because the church has invested in my library of books.

I am thankful for the men whom the Lord has placed in my life, both official and unofficial mentors, who have shaped me, corrected me, and encouraged me along the way.

I am thankful for the privilege of shepherding saints that have gone to be with the Lord, for the honor of singing Psalms to them on their deathbed, and preaching the gospel to their friends and family.

I am thank for the saints that I continue to shepherd, for the brotherhood and camaraderie that I am able to share with my fellow elders, and for the fellowship I enjoy with the other men. It is joy to toil for the kingdom together, earning our gray hairs side-by-side.

I am thankful that Western Meadows has stood beside me as I continue to grow into the role of pastor.

I am thankful that the Good Shepherd has given me the honor of being one of His under-shepherds.

To shepherd souls that He has purchased with His blood.

To study the Word.

To stand before God’s people for eleven years now and say, “Thus says the LORD.”